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Tuesday, December 01, 2009 

"The Rosa Klebb of letters"

The next time someone asks me why I don't like Ayn Rand, really, all I have to do is point them here.

I did a book report on "The Fountainhead", I think it was, when I was in grade 10. It impressed me, as indicated in the review, but it also repulsed me as it warred with my socialist tendencies. I think you know which side won out.

Gold.

"Fuck you, Ayn Rand.

Fuck you for turning some of the most open and interesting people I ever met into utopian dickheads.

Fuck you for injecting them with a sneering sense of superiority, and with the tautological belief that anyone who didn't "get it" was a jealous know-nothing—which, ipso facto, only proved that superiority.

And fuck you for prose so bad that the only way to measure it is with a meat scale.

There. I feel better.

But wait—Ayn, you know that letter I just got informing me that my equity line of credit is being frozen despite my perfect credit history, and despite the fact that I bought a house I could actually afford?

Yeah, fuck you for that, too."

Thanks for posting this.

Well Dad, I know we wouldn't get along nearly as well if you were a Randroid.

Glad you guys liked it.

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Ian Mathers is a freelance writer whose work has appeared in Stylus, the Village Voice, Resident Advisor, PopMatters, and elsewhere. He does stuff and it magically appears here.

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