"Atimetus got me pregnant"
Via the ever-wonderful Ryan North of Qwantz, here's an amazing page full of graffiti from Pompeii. A lot of it is pretty quotidian (although still interesting), but occasionally you get something extremely amusing/resonant:
We have wet the bed, host. I confess we have done wrong. If you want to know why, there was no chamber pot (on an inn room wall)
Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog
Lesbianus, you defecate and you write, ‘Hello, everyone!’ (on either a bar or a pottery shop)
Let everyone one in love come and see. I want to break Venus’ ribs with clubs and cripple the goddess’ loins. If she can strike through my soft chest, then why can’t I smash her head with a club?
We have wet the bed, host. I confess we have done wrong. If you want to know why, there was no chamber pot (on an inn room wall)
Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog
Lesbianus, you defecate and you write, ‘Hello, everyone!’ (on either a bar or a pottery shop)
Let everyone one in love come and see. I want to break Venus’ ribs with clubs and cripple the goddess’ loins. If she can strike through my soft chest, then why can’t I smash her head with a club?
