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Thursday, November 22, 2007 

Could it be me?

So I'm cleaning my room, and going through an old box of stuff I find two papers I wrote in March, 2004 (that'd be the fourth and penultimate year of my BA). I got an A- for "Metaphysical Nothing and Logical Nothing: An Investigation of Heidegger's Conception of Nothingness," and an A for "Bad Faith and the Despairing Self: Conflicts Between Sarte's Anguish and Kierkegaard's Despair" (no number grade for either, at least on the papers). The comments from both professors are very flattering, especially in retrospect. I remember both papers, and although certainly writing them was kind of a pain in the butt (as writing any paper for school is), my overriding impression of them is how much I enjoyed them, and how smoothly they came out.

This is actually pretty depressing, considering how much doing philosophy work has felt like pulling teeth the last year or so. I used to love this stuff! Reading over the papers, I still love this stuff! Why has it gotten so hard? Do philosophy and I need to break up for a while?

Well you are reading and writing on philosophers like Kierkegaard. He says to live and enjoy life, not just labor over philosophy. Maybe you're just taking it to heart.

Thanks, that's a particularly flattering take on it. It could be that, it could be that I'm just not suited for grad school!

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Ian Mathers is a freelance writer whose work has appeared in Stylus, the Village Voice, Resident Advisor, PopMatters, and elsewhere. He does stuff and it magically appears here.

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