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Tuesday, January 04, 2011 

"I cannot answer you, because it’s totally unknown to me what you just asked me, and also very boring."

Two great things on the internet today: an amazing Wall Street Journal article about some new developments at PepsiCo, which features the words "snackify" and "drinkify" liberally. It includes what was absolutely the best quotation in any newspaper story from 2010:

Mehmood Khan, a former Mayo Clinic endocrinologist who heads PepsiCo's nutrition group, said in an interview that it's outdated to think that snacks are dry and beverages are wet.

I'm going to say it again: it's outdated to think that snacks are dry and beverages are wet. Make sure you're not behind the times!

And yet, despite the utter glory of that quotation, the AV Club's interview with famous professional weird guy Udo Kier might actually be better. Just read the whole thing, and rejoice in the fact that you live in a world where, one day, Udo Kier might snackify his drinks and drinkify his snacks.

He's right, thing about it! You can't spell "drink" without "dry"... sort of. Drinking your food and eating your drinks is the way of the future.

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Ian Mathers is a freelance writer whose work has appeared in Stylus, the Village Voice, Resident Advisor, PopMatters, and elsewhere. He does stuff and it magically appears here.

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